Isn’t God’s Creation wonderful? Here we are: techno-wizards of the highest order, masters of the ultimate information network and crafters of machines that would boggle the minds of all our ancestors… and yet the mice are laughing at me.
You would think the odds are in my favor.
Me: 2 cats, 130 IQ, strength of at least 1000 mice, l33t ‘puter sk1llz
Mice: a couple of themselves, 2 IQ, agility of 1000 humans, l33t chewin’ sk1llz.
It’s not completely the cats’ fault. These new super mice must have escaped from NIMH or something. They’re downright crafty. I’ve never had this much trouble getting rid of a few vermin before. But I’ve got a plan to win this cold war.
This time, the cats aren’t allowed to go outside or sleep with us until we’re confident the mice are gone. Content cats can be fooled, but bored cats are lethal killing machines. By this time tomorrow, the rodent incursion should be quashed.
Brigadeer-General Mather signing off.
UPDATE Feb 2008: The mouse problem was finally decisively dealt with a while ago by cleaning out the garage and heavily modifying our front porch. It turns out that part of the infestation was taking refuge where the cats couldn’t reach in the garage, but also a huge hollow space under the cement porch. Apparently the original builders weren’t thinking that cutting corners there would give vermin an invitation to infest. Jerks.
In any case, we haven’t seen signs of mice for quite a while and are confident that the problem is finally solved.